Horrible Tips for Dealing with Horrible People.

There are many different kinds of people in life, and each kind requires its own unique method of interaction.
There are the amazing best friends who can make you smile even when you think you don't want to; and on the opposite end of the spectrum are the horrible people. You know who I'm talking about: the arrogant ones; the mean ones; the ones that you wish would be sentenced to "75-years-to-life" in federal prison, now, as a preventative measure, simply to escape the inevitable-- that they will probably murder you someday.
Although we all wish we could only spend our time with the awesome ones, life makes sure we get to spend a good, solid amount of time with the awful ones too. So, because of that (and my overactive imagination..), I've compiled a list of horrible ways to deal with horrible people. Enjoy!

1. Two words: Rocket Ship
2. If you're not quite a billionaire and can't afford to send your problematic person to pluto.. excuse me, asteroid number 134340, then you could always go with the less expensive: hiring of a hit man to break their jaw. This would be a good solution because it would require their jaw to be wired shut for several months, disabling their ability to talk to you. Warning: the effects of this solution will eventually wear off, and they may not be to pleased if they find out you hired a hit man to break their jaw..
 3. Pull a Taylor Swift and wright a song about it. 
4. Blog about it.
5. If the above suggestions are too extreme, or you just feel like embracing your inner second grader, go Batesian and mimic! Sink to their level and beat them at their own game. To do this simply repeat every single thing they say back to them and nothing else, the rest of the time stare blankly at them. Continue this for several hours. Hopefully they'll get so creeped out, they'll never want to talk to you again.
6. I suppose you could always be the bigger person and ignore them... but I don't know. I kind of like being short. Plus big people are more likely to hit their head on stuff. 
7. Do something that would get them in trouble and frame them like the Mona Lisa.
8. Find a way to make everything they own smell like old pickles. I don't know how that would help your situation, but it seems like fun.
9. Pull a Hermione Granger and punch them in the face. 
10. Actually ignore them and focus on the amazing people that you hang out with instead. 

well, this has been fun.. I know this probably makes me sound like a horrible person, but oh well. Please don't make everything I own smell like old pickles.. thanks. I'd really appreciate it:)

Disclaimer: though there are times when I would love to do some of this stuff, I do not recommend it... you'll probably get in trouble or something.. hence the name: Horrible tips for dealing with horrible people.